Updates! #ForeverLoved Balloon project

I can't believe how many names we have collected so far... I am devestated and honored to be able to write not only Emmets name on a baloon, but also to write the names or dates of 70 others at the last count.

Day four. WISH #MWAH2017

Wishes. If wishes were snowflakes I would have a blizzard. I wish a million things.

Coping quote 19

I love this. Some day's it's easier to remember than others. 

Self-care for improved emotional wellness – This Tiny Blue House

https://www.thistinybluehouse.com/2017/04/26/self-care-for-improved-emotional-wellness/ This lovely lady is a mther of one lovely little girl and "5 angels'. She has some good points about self care and dealing with anxiety.

Things can only get better

If you're getting tired of my using song lyric puns for post titles sorry​ not sorry... It makes me laugh. My sense of humour is dogey and always has been. Bad jokes make me giggle, such as: Q. What do you call a laughing piano? A. A Yamaha-ha... I know. Terrible.  Point is I find …

That app

I deleted it just now. The pregnancy tracker app. I used it, even when there wasn't a them to track anymore because it made me feel closer to them, but I've realised that all it was doing was taking me away, because it wasn't real anymore. I haven't needed to look on it for a …

Safety net.

Safety nets, we all have them.

The buisness of being Zoe

I've chosen to put my name on this blog for the first time. Why? Because it's mine. Because I want my mark on it. Because I will not be ashamed.

Coping quotes 10

Today.

Today is the first 22nd that I have had school. Every other month this day has managed to fall on a weekend or holiday. It had to happen eventually; but why today of all days when there are no free periods and no breaks wherin I could just hide from the world? I was forced …

Whisper support group

Surviving Miscarriage Together also runs a support group through Whisper  fing us here. Love and support always,  Surviving Miscarriage Together x

Limbo land

Warning this is a long mildly ranty post. Sorry x Some days I'm alright. Other days it feels like I died too, they just forgot to bury me. Or else I'm stuck in limbo land, it feels like I'm not really here, I'm not myself I'm just this other. I'm waiting for something, anything to …

Playlist Surviving Miscarriage Together

Updated playlist I find music very comforting, and a valuable emotional release. I find it easier to cope with music. Here are some songs I have found that I found really helpful during and after my miscarriage. * means the song contains religious content, so you can avoid it if this is an issue for …

Look up to the Skye and see…

Today I found out that my 'sister in law' (sorta. We'll call her this for simplicities sake) is having a baby girl, and that they plan to name her Skye. When I first learned that my brother and sister in law (on my partners side) were having a baby I was heartbroken, I felt so …

Piss off I’m just an auntie

My partners brother (henceforth termed brother in law) and his partner are having a baby. People on my side of the family keep teasing me about knitting baby shoes when we gather to watch tv on a sunday with the whole clan together. 'Ohh are you expecting' 'Look someone's broody' 'It'll be your turn soon' …

5 happy things 3

My five happy things for this weeks My in laws are having a baby! There is now a use for ny hopeless urge to buy/make baby clothes  Seriously I. GET. TO. BE. AN. AUNT. AGAIN!(As I now claim all children of my partners siblings as nieces/ nephews as well as kids of my own siblings.)  …

The future, maybe?

​I am doing my best at focusing on being grateful for what I have, and the chances and choices I have, rather than those which I don't.  I know it's not an option for us for ten plus years yet, (i.e. after the necesary goals of or a job and a house have all been …

Ode to health based infirtility

​Mostly I just want to be a mother. A mother with a living, breathing, hold your hand as you cross the street child.  I now have a 20% chance of re-occurring miscarriage due to losing my first pregnancy. Added to that the 13% increace that is associated with severe joint hypermobility syndrome we're looking at 33%. …

Hopeful?

I don't really feel very hopeful at the moment. Actually all I feel is empty and numb and sad. I sometimes feel a bit disassociated with my life. Like there is now way this is happening. Time is not moving on, I can't keep up with it. I feel just a bit 'outside' all the …

Five happy things 2

Harry Potter quiz night was Friday, that was a lot of fun. And I met my partner for cake on the market cross and book shopping in the afternoon which was exactly what I needed. I am grateful for fluffy fluffy pjamas and fluffy socks because they make me happy even when I'm really sick. …